There may be a woman in you who would love a Saturday golf lesson. Or a dinner with people who ask interesting questions. Or a business of her own, a trip somewhere beautiful, a little more recognition for what she knows. You catch a glimpse of her when something gets your attention and you think, “I would love that.” Then the day keeps moving. You answer the message, finish the task, and put the idea somewhere beside the other things you fully intend to get around to.
If you have a collection of those ideas, I would love for you to stay with me for a moment. They may tell you something useful about the season you’re in. You can be proud of your life and still feel curious about what you want from the years ahead. There are experiences you haven’t had and parts of yourself you might enjoy getting to know. That is a lovely reason to pay attention.
This is the woman I had in mind when I created CIQ, pronounced “seek”: a personal expansion society for women who feel ready to explore their next chapter with an intentional circle beside them. She might have a clear goal. She might simply know she wants better conversations, something new on her calendar, and a little more say in how her days feel. Both give her somewhere to begin.
Maybe you’re in your forties or fifties, and your preferences are getting wonderfully specific. You know which invitations interest you. You have ideas about how you want to spend your time, even if you haven’t quite made room for them yet. You may be building a business, raising children, caring for family, considering a change in work, or enjoying a season with more freedom. You’d like your own interests to have a real place alongside the other things that matter to you.
And those interests can have range. You might want financial success and slower mornings. Meaningful work and a reason to get dressed up on a Thursday. A circle of women who will talk through a big idea with you and also say, “Yes, let’s book the table.” You’re allowed to enjoy beautiful things, ambitious plans, ordinary pleasures, and thoughtful conversation in the same life. We don’t have to make ourselves easier to describe by choosing only one.
The question is how to bring a little of what you want into the week you actually live. A picture of a wonderful future can be exciting, but it helps to find the part you can participate in now. If you imagine having interesting friends, where might you meet them regularly? If you want to feel creative again, what would you enjoy making? If you want to be seen for your expertise, where could you share something you know? Those questions give an appealing idea a place to land.
You might arrive wanting to become more confident speaking up. Another woman may be exploring a new direction in her work. Someone else may want friendships and experiences beyond her familiar routine. You can have different goals and still enjoy the same circle. What brings you together is an interest in participating more fully in your own life, along with a willingness to listen, share, and encourage another woman as she does the same.
Choose a pace that works with your responsibilities and resources. Give yourself time to become familiar with the people and possibilities around you. A fuller life can grow through repeated, ordinary decisions to include something that matters to you.
You have lived enough to bring something valuable to this chapter, and you still get to be surprised by it. I hope you give yourself the chance.
A CIQ action · SELF
In your journal, finish this sentence: “A version of me I would enjoy getting to know is the woman who ______.” Choose one small way to meet her within the next seven days. Try an activity, start a conversation, or make a specific plan that fits your time and budget. Notice what you enjoy and what you’d like to explore next.
If you’ve been reading this and thinking, “Yes. That sounds like the season I’m in,” you've found a home at CIQ Society. We’re making room for possibilities, relationships, experiences, learning, and the woman you’re becoming along the way. Bring an interest, a question, or something you’d love to try. That’s a good place to start.